Pets or Mate?
The fastest growing demographic is the single person. Meanwhile, Americans own more pets than people in any other country. Why are people deciding a primary relationship with Rover is more negotiable than one with a husband or wife? My show would explore the lifestyles of single people.
Very candid topic. Certainly high interest. Also, great voice with great inflections. Well done!
that everyone is heterosexual.
Yes, I'm aware of that limitation and continue to mull over how to expand the show's concept so it has more universal meaning. For starters, with a 50% divorce rate among heterosexual married couples, straight folks have done a stellar job of botching their attempt at making the institution of marriage work, and therefore have something to learn from gays and lesbians about the value and meaning of making that lifelong, legal commitment called "marriage."
While my two-minute attempt at describing the sorry states of affairs between men and women does neglect the experiences of non-heterosexuals, I would hope the show, in the unlikely event it should ever develop, would be inclusive and diverse in the topics it covers. After all, regardless of sexual orientation, the human heart is pretty much the same in all of us.
Thanks for making a great point.
Best,
Mary
Mary, you are an articulate & powerful speaker, and you convey a poignant message. A thoughtful discourse on relationships and lifestyles would be beneficial on many levels in a world in which we not only connect more strongly with a pet than a spouse, but also in a world in which many have learned to communicate on a cellphone or computer, but not to a human face. We have distanced ourselves from "community" on so many levels, each of us living in a vacuum, each of us complete in his or her technological world. I remember growing up in a neighborhood where we had annual picnics and events. Everybody knew everybody and we visited one another in each others' homes frequently. When I married and settled into a home, however, I barely knew the neighbors. I didn't get together with them and I wasn't drawn to knowing them more. What happened in the interim? What has made us so socially isolated? Perhaps the discoveries made by your program and your work as host of it would reveal some answers to those questions. Thank you for offering this beautiful entry. - Joy
Joy, I am deeply touched by your words of encouragement, and your observations about the isolating influence of technology resonate. The upside of technology is that it connects people like us. Without it, I doubt we ever would have met.
With gratitude,
Mary
interesting, complex and multi-faceted....A dog lover myself, I hear your message and it's creating an inner dialogue of questions and thoughts...makes me want to hear more.
good luck, fellow Mary!!
~mary
http://www.publicradioquest.com/node/1067
This was honest, intriguing, thoughtful, and could be controversial. This is such an interesting topic. I liked your style. You left me wanting more than two minutes. Well done.
Clearly a thoughtful, intelligent host. That's what's needed to keep a show like this from drifting into endless bashing of the opposite sex or banal dating tips. This could be good.
Please check out my submission too:
Think the subject matter will provide endless, worthy, and useful dialogue. Your relaxed style will enhance the conversation nicely.
Mary, you've hit on a fantastic idea for a show that should interest singles and doubles alike. The conversation here on the comments page certainly shows that this is a topic people are eager to discuss. Your professional delivery and casual, relaxed style would make the show both a pleasure to hear and to appear on as a guest. Good luck!
HI Mary -- So good to hear you!! Your entry sparked a long conversation between Dan and me. Let's have the three of us continue this on the deck one of these summer evenings. You're a radio natural and you got my vote! Good luck, Sally
Mary,
You have a natural radio voice/persona and you pose an intriguing question. I find your style entertaining and inviting; it makes me want to hear the ensuing dialogue!
I think we are still awaiting the "evolution" in the "men's revolution"--technology has simply been a great enabler to accelerate the same empty indulgences of the past. As women, we need to recognize it in when it happens. In the mean time, take care of that pet!
Good luck to you--I'll be listening!
I'm firstly unsure there's anything wrong with the fact that people seeming to be waiting later and later to get married. I'm 27 and single, most of my friends my age and a few years younger are getting married now. When my mom was my age she'd been married for 8 years?! I can't even imagine.
I'm also in a committed relationship with my cat, Abby, who likes it when I come home and scolds me when I don't, so I've got plenty of affectionate nagging and unconditional love and fuzzy backyard bug chasing to keep me happy. I've dated people, but I'm not satisfied with MY life, so I'm never satisfied with the people I date. Personally, I'm okay with that.
I don't know what you mean by "men's revolution", or how online pornography slots into that. Pornography certainly didn't start with the internet, nor was it difficult to find before the advent of the VCR. I felt like your points were fuzzy, but perhaps I just didn't GET your writing.
As to voice and pacing, very professional. Definite call-in show material, no doubt about that.
Good luck to you!
Be Baffled By Bafflegab!-->
www.publicradioquest.com/node/1319
"All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy" - Spike Milligan
Devon,
Thanks for taking the time to write all that! I agree delaying marriage is almost always a good thing. Not sure where in my piece I indicated a different opinion? In fact, I've never been married and I'm old enough to be your mom, so I hope you understand where I'm really coming from on that subject.
Yes, my points are fuzzy. Again, not sure I claimed anything different. If I tried to convey anything in my piece, it's that I'm flummoxed by the state of relations between men and women nowadays, and I do not have answers. My main point, I hope, was simply to present an interesting cultural trend that affects a central part of many people's lives, and to express my curiosity about that trend, and to suggest we start a conversation about it.
As for my claim that men are having a cultural revolution similar to the feminist movements (because there have been at least three that I know of), maybe you have to be a woman to feel that way. What I've observed is that many men want to be free of the kinds of commitments (EX: marriage, fatherhood, supporting a family financially, or simply being publicly identified as someone's exclusive boyfriend) that, until recently, were commonplace. This level of freedom sounds like a liberation movement to me! I'm no expert on why it's happening, and when I point to cultural influences such as online pornography (yes, porn was available before the Internet-- but not the way it is now--I'm older than you, so please accept my expertise on this one) and chat rooms, I'm simply speculating on causes.
I listened to your piece and I can hear we are different in many ways, which makes sense considering our gender and age differences (and I'm sure there are more than two). Your work is very bright and clever and professional and honestly I didn't completely understand it, but that's okay, because this contest is about finding new voiceS.
Again, thanks for your thoughtful feedback. Best of luck to you.
Mary
Well, thanks very much! I'm not sure WHY, but there's a natural inclination to expect a clear solution to a problem from a person you hear on the radio. The natural flow is Set up a problem, Describe the history, Sell the solution (or the point), but I see that what you are doing is raising a question in public that has no easy answer and asking yourself questions about it as you ask us. Understood.
Anything that provokes some honest conversation is a good thing, yes?! Good luck right back atcha!
"All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy" - Spike Milligan
I agree with Patrick! I really like your sense of humor, and I thought your delivery & pacing were very good. Plus, interesting idea for a show...all of the singles that I know (and there are a lot) would definitely dig it.
Great job!
(no offense to anyone in Utah)
"Happiness is the best revenge!"
Mary,
This was painfully funny. Your fresh and honest voice is the perfect one to bring these stories to us. My pets think so too!
I had to listen a second time just to be sure. Oh, yes! There is a tongue in that cheek. I had never planned on being single, had always hoped to find a woman smart enough to know what she had and dumb enough to put up with it. I always seem to end up with someone who has deficits in the "dumb enough" department. Eh...maybe it's just me.
Jim Barfuss
http://www.publicradioquest.com/user/2824
“Life is full of surprises. When I looked toward the future in my youth, I did not see myself standing here.” Seymour B. Moore
This entry has that "certain something" that works. Way to knock the ball out of the park.
Great topic and nice entry! It would be a really interesting dialogue to hear what people have to say about being single. For me, it seems like there is a lack of clearly defined roles for people in relationships for the modern western person. This is not an argument for going back to traditional roles, but I think if we realize that we do need to define what our role is and what we want from a relationship, then it makes it easier to sustain. And by roles, I refer to maybe more of the superficial stuff like money and cleaning and everday living. It sort of takes the romance out of it, though. That's maybe why pets are easier. The role is pretty clearly defined. At least most of the time.
Oh yeah, and I also totally loved your ending as well.
And my first reaction was spot-on: I was laughing! It happened all three times. So I sat back and listened a fourth time ... OK, let's be analytical about this; time to get serious ... nope. Laughing again. Mary, your audition immediately brought up this great, affectionate sense of fun in me. I was curious and intrigued and was completely confident you were going to be a fine tour guide. In the first 20 seconds, I was along for the ride, and that's the best compliment I could give. Lead me through this jungle. I also love how self-effacing you are ("maybe it's me ...") - that's vital so you don't come across as sanctimonious, and you clearly get that. Loved it. And whether you meant it or not, I chuckled at the last two words: "Call me?" Are you asking that of the callers ... or the judges? A really, really terrific audition. I wish you the best - patrick
Patrick,
I'm overwhelmed by your encouraging comments. It feels great to have at least one person "get it," and even better for that person to be a man, since I was concerned men might think I'm engaging in man bashing, which isn't my intention at all. Getting this feedback from someone whose entry I admire makes it all that much more valued.
Thank you!
Mary
I enjoyed your piece. As someone who spends a lot of time talking about companion animals and related issues, this was thought-provoking.
Nobody teaches anyone about relationships in school. Too much solo fumbling around for solutions without either side really talking about it with each other.
Steve
People either do what they are predisposed to do, or compelled to do.
Pets always win, because they never ask you if they look fat!!!
This link leads to the best kept secret on the site
http://www.publicradioquest.com/audio/user/8769
Brendan,
Pets may not be obsessed with their weight, but their owners are (is it still okay to call ourselves "owners"?). Hence all the diet pet foods that are on the market, including the one I actually buy for my cat, who (whom?), I might note, has almost doubled in size since joining my household a year ago as a malnourished stray. So the obsession with perfection can and does extend to our pets, I am sorry to report.
You have a great topic and one that will resonate with many people. Speaking for myself, my lifelong quest for perfection has managed to deny untold opportunities for personal happiness. Also, you have a nice voice, which is kinda' a requirement for a radio show.
Good luck.
Mary
always a good subject, and a volatile one. Too many "experts", I'm sure. As a host, you'd probably need a muzzle and a whip in the studio.
good luck!
Christine
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